with Nate the Great
Hey, bro, what's up? Nate the Great's my name and magic is my game. Listen, if you want an inside track to Babe World, then magic is the WAY to GO. All those guys playing football and baseball, they don't know shizznat about the ladies.
And what's to know about the ladies?
They like pizazz.
Totally, like, when I first got to high school, things weren't going so well. None of the babes digged me. They were uptight because I was shorter than them and I was always looking at their bazonkas.
Hey? Can you blame me? They shoulda taken it as a compliment. Huge bazonkas are, like, the shizznat.
Anyway, all I had to do was start pulling a little magic here and there and I had them in the palm of my hand. Now I'm serving magic for people almost every other day. At parties, cool kids' houses, you name it. Feel interested? Just follow this steps and you'll, like, be in there.
1. Get a Cool Name
Nobody does magic without a cool name. Check out mine: Nate the Great. It's the shizznat! It's catchy and it rhymes. Now, say your name is Joshua or Morton. THAT'S just another way to say BITCH. Know what I'm saying? I'm just trying to be real. Shorten your name to J Man or Mo Dawg and you'll be totally in there.
2. Keep It Real
Just like I was doing with you. I was keeping it real and that's what you gotta do with folks or they're never going to buy your magic. Part of that's just confidence. Keep your eyes on their eyes and let them know that you're just here to have fun. Just wanna party. Babes LOVE to party.
3. Run Deep
You can't go out on the field if you don't have a helmet. You feel me, dawg? You gotta have the right equipment or your magic's never gonna take off. Me? I always get my magic stuff from the best guys. They keep it real and they have cool names like Slice, Candy Man, Skillet and James. That's, like, the first two things on my list. They also don't cheap skate me, which is the most important part of doing magic: that people know your magic is real and its not just sugar or pencil shavings.
4. Keep the Code
All good magicians know you don't reveal your secrets. So, don't go telling the whole school about your magic, okay? Hell to the yeah, people can talk about how your magic is the shizznat, but you can't go doing all this self promo. The one thing you gotta know about magic before anything is that some people are just bitches and can't handle it. They'll tell everybody about your magic. So, be careful who you talk to. Magicians got to keep themselves tight. Know what I'm saying?
5. Don't Be A Bitch
Maybe you're wondering when the babes are coming in? Well, this is it. Once you master everything above, you can take your show on the road ANYWHERE. I've been invited to so many parties I can't count. People love magic. And you know who loves magic the most? White girls. Especially the ones with huge bazonkas. And you might say, 'Man, Nate Dawg. I don't want a white girl.' Hold up, bro. White girls are the shizz now! The best thing to do is to toss a girl a little magic on the house to get her going and she won't stop! You'll be up to your neck in bazonkas in no time!
And that's all you've got to do! Now, it's not gonna happen all at once. You gotta start small first. Just keep at it and you'll find that babes will always be up on you for some magic once you've let them have a taste. I mean, what could be better? Totally hot babes all on you and making a little cash on the side. Is there anything wrong with that?
Nope. It's just capitalism, bro!
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